Brera me!

€50K, for the underpowered four-cylinder model. Gulp. At least these things depreciate like shares in subprime mortgaging, so I might be able to get one some day. But then I want the V6, and the full Alfa deal: beige leather seats, and that wonderful exhaust roar, and a suit to match. I would let it rip on the Autobahn, compete with the Porsches and M6s.


True to form, I like its rear end best. When I first passed one in real life, I almost drove into a wall.

I like the Spider too, but it's pretty pointless in my country. It would just be sitting in a garage, and Alfas fall to bits when they don't get to move.



This superficial guy needs to get a proper job.

Top Gear Rules OK

I'm a total car freak, and I love the laddish British motoring show Top Gear even more. It's real good old boys fun and when they have a new series, which unfortunately only happens once or twice a year, it's the only TV I watch really. They like to cut the crap, go directly to the good stuff and skip the reviews of the latest Toyota Snoozer.

They're also wise enough not to fall into the American trap - lead presenter/yob/opinionated buffoon/intelligent bigot Jeremy Clarkson refuses to do a special American version of the show. Not a problem really, because there's nothing wrong with the original British version. I'm sure American audiences would much prefer to see Aston Martins and Ferraris to Dodges. Cool American supercars are featured in the British version anyway. And the challenges, the barbs, the rivalry and the things you always wanted to do as a boy but they do as adults are cool wherever they were filmed.

The presenters - Clarkson, James "Captain Slow" May and Richard "Hamster" Hammond are incredibly good at pissing off select members of society, and the Beeb is used to dealing with complaints about the show. Honestly, people need to get a sense of humour.



So I'm overjoyed to find they did a summer special. In true Top Gear style, they go to the Arctic while Europe is lying on the beach. Can't wait to see it!

EDIT: just saw it and it was brilliant. Hammond really lost his metro look this time. Catch it if you can live with the mental image of a frost-bitten foreskin.