Tuesday, 9 October 2007

I have to admit it

I am hunting. It's a hard thing to admit, but there you go.

I am actively looking for someone, and am preparing a mental check list of what that person should be like. This is what I have so far, because I want to be a little open-minded:

1. Similar age.
2. Similar education.
3. And, of course, good looks.

It may sound superficial, but I think they are vital. You need to have some form of attraction and some common ground, longer term relationships don't work without them. Too young makes me feel dirty, too old just doesn't fit me.

So I was excited to be contacted by a 26 year old student from my local town, at my Alma mater. Maybe a little too excited; we have been chatting but not much else.

He's severely closeted; it took a long time before he revealed his name. His profile is without pictures, he calls himself bi but admits to move towards men and says he has experience but it's not very convincing. Also, he says he hardly ever visited the gay strip, so I wonder if he has ever really been.

But I think there could be something here. I am prepared to keep on chatting, to see if any developments could be realistic. Maybe even meet up for drinks or coffee or something. This will never develop into a hook up, and I don't want it to.

Because this guy appears to be all or nothing: a serious date, or nothing at all. Fine with me: it could be a healthy development.


W said...

That's really nice of you to not banish him cuz he's severely closeted. I used to not have pictures and such as well at one point and didn't like it when ppl just threw up their hand cuz I was too closeted.If he feels comfortable talking to you then in the long run maybe he'll loosen about his identity and such.
Nice that you're not going to stop chatting.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Good for you Pete, I really hope you do find the right guy, it would be great to see you in a relationship. You have a good head on your shoulders, I know you will pick the right one.

I was a bit mixed up when I went to your blog this morning, I open "Falling off" and for a second I'm looking at "I have to admit it", I think you owe "K" some sort of copy right payment!


Pete said...

Oh yes, K has picked the magic words in the owning up department. I owe him for that, but it might have scarred me for life! ;-)

K said...


My next post is going to be entitled "Falling off a log"
just out of spite!

Now, time to be serious, I agree with Erik...it was nice of you to keep chatting. It kinda hits close to home because remember I don't have my pictures up on the gay website I am on either. You never really know man...he could be the one, who knows!

Steve said...

Closeted guys are people too, it's nice that you didn't just blacklist him because of it.

It might get a little hard if you indeed start something serious between the two of you, but who knows, maybe you'll be the boy to help him out of his shell.

Whatever the case, be it this guy or someone else, all the best in finding what you want. Just be prepared for things to not go exactly to plan, though.